The Cheltenham Trust is delighted to welcome comedian and author Lou Beckett to Cheltenham Town Hall on Thursday 12 February at 7pm to celebrate the official launch of her brand-new book, Lessons from a Default Parent: Surviving the Front Line of Family Life (Without Losing Your Sht)*.
Marking its publication day, this special live event will see Lou in conversation with Steph Douglas, writer, podcaster and owner of Stroud-based business Don’t Buy Her Flowers, for an honest, funny and deeply relatable discussion about the realities of modern parenting.
Who organises the school run, plans the parties, remembers the PE kit, books the clubs, sorts the laundry – and still tries to hold down a ‘real’ job? For many families, the answer is the default parent.
A mother of two, former secondary school teacher, wife of comedian Rob Beckett and self-confessed default parent, Lou will explore the emotional and practical realities of family life, from playground politics and endless logistics to three-hour bedtimes and the mental load that never clocks off. The evening will expand on the themes of the book, offering audiences the chance to hear first-hand what she’s learned (sometimes the hard way) about rebalancing the load, lowering expectations and surviving the chaos with humour intact.
Lou said,
“This book was born out of a general frustration I was feeling at the new role of ‘the default parent’ I had found myself filling, one that I’m not entirely sure I ever really signed up for. Because as much as I love my family, the impact of having children on your sense of self is unimaginable.
Sometimes, when the children have taken three hours to go to bed because ‘they’ve forgotten how to go to sleep’ (a real complaint from my youngest), they’ve refused to get dressed for school because their trousers are ‘too soft’ (again, a real complaint from the youngest), they’ve apparently forgotten how to respond to their names and, despite getting everyone up and ready horrifyingly early, you’re still struggling to get everyone out the door and into the car as the clock creeps menacingly towards the absolute latest you can leave without having to go in through the school office walk of shame, you need to go and have a coffee with other people who just ‘get it’.”
The event is a celebration for anyone navigating the front line of family life, juggling work, home and identity, and looking to feel a little less alone. With warmth, humour and shared experience, Lou and Steph will explore why the ‘mental load’ still falls disproportionately, how it impacts relationships and careers, and what small shifts might help families rebalance.
Jessica Brewster, CEO of The Cheltenham Trust, said,
“We are thrilled to be hosting this event at Cheltenham Town Hall to celebrate the launch of Lou’s debut book Lessons from a Default Parent. There are so many parents in Cheltenham and beyond who are juggling work, family life and the never-ending to-do list, who will recognise themselves in Lou’s book. I’m really looking forward to a funny, frank and deeply relatable evening celebrating those people we often depend on the most – the carriers of the mental load.”
Following the discussion, Lou will be signing books in partnership with local independent Cleeve Bookshop. Tickets are £29 including Lessons from a Default Parent, or £12 ticket only, available to book at cheltenhamtownhall.org.uk/event/lou-beckett-lessons-from-a-default-parent.
